Thursday, June 26, 2014

Take a breath, take a break

Blogging blogging blogging... Seems like the easiest thing in the world, but also the hardest.

Since last time I've enjoyed Iceland's beautiful and picturesque nature, arrived back to Finland after 9 months of student exchange, attended a surprise party upon my return arranged by my wonderful friends, wandered on the streets of Amsterdam with my "Disney friends" and enjoyed some free time before I started working last Friday. That's my life in a nutshell at the moment.

So the reason I haven't been blogging so much is because I've been planning for a very very long time on beginning a new blog in the near future. I've been just semi-lazy and been planning. Because I actually have a plan for my new blog and I want it to look nice too (and I'm a perfectionist...). I'll probably have it up and running later this summer or in the fall, because of lack of time and also summer holidaying to be honest. I have to get my motivation and ambition really up before I do it so it won't just fall to pieces. I actually don't remember the last time I blogged this little, so I've decided to actually have a blog break until the new one is up and running. Not to say, if I have something cool to blog about I will, but you can pretty much count me out of the blogosphere for a while now.

With this I want to say, have a nice summer (or winter if you happen to live in such country) and see you laters! :)

Friday, May 16, 2014


So I'm sitting on the train, the same one I came to Utica with, having just said goodbye to the last person. And maybe also one of the most important ones - Dan. He was our international coordinator and like a dad to all of us. We sat in the train station for almost an hour and just chatted the time away, since the train was surprise surprise late. Two days ago I had to say goodbye to my best suitemate, Dana, Salli and a bunch of other people, including Hossam, who actually came back for one more day since his flight was cancelled. How lucky was that? To spend one more day of fun with us! Me and Anna we're chilling outside yesterday since it was so hot and sunny, then me and Nacho were throwing rugby ball, which was actually quite fun. After this the rest of us girls; me, Anna, Natsumi, Emi, Mai Anh and a second Vietnamese girl I for the love of God can't remember the name of, went to a Vietnamese restaurant. It was so yummy, but I still think Thai food is my fave!

When we came back from the restaurant the guys were playing volleyball so we joined them and had a little tournament going on, we ended our days in Utica the same way we started them. Volleyball has actually became a favorite sport of mine, I mean taking two classes and also playing it for fun has made it's impact. And I'm not supershitty at it anymore! Later in the evening all of us were hanging out and then we went out for a last night out. I was so tired, but thought "What the hell, why not?". It was actually very fun and just nice to hang with everyone. We came back to the dorms and were watching Wolf of Wall Street for a bit, but then I got supertired, was falling asleep already, and went to say goodbye to everyone. I'm not good at goodbyes, but then again who is? I always see goodbyes not as a definite bye, but more like a "hope to see you soon again".  And I really really do hope I see all of you guys again! As someone said yesterday (Fraol? Nacho?) that I'm probably the one who will see everyone again since I travel so much and just go everywhere. I hope my travels will bring me together with all of you even if it takes me ten years! I mean, me and my girls from Paris try and see each other at least once a year, or that's my goal at least, and so far we have succeeded.

So I'm on the train on my way to my next adventures. I'm staying in New York City until Sunday, I will meet the German girl, Britta, (who I met in DC), tomorrow for a night out and that's probably gonna be awesome. Can't wait!! Then my travels continue to Iceland for another couple of days and on Wednesday I will finally be home again! Only thing that worries me at the moment is all my luggage. I have a shitload of it and don't even know how I'm getting out from Penn Station with them. After that it's expensive cab rides all the way. Oh yeah, and the overweight.... I have like 15kg extra, at least!! Maybe I can cry a bit at the airport and explain I'm a girl who loves shopping way too much and have stayed here for nine months. Maybe that'll work?

See you in Finland all! :)

My empty room

Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Cry cry baby

Today is going to be a cry day. Many of the internationals are leaving tomorrow, so it's going to be sad. I have one more full day left, but I don't mind since we're having 25-28 degrees hot in here.

Now going to last class to have a food night with our class mates. Yum!

Saturday, May 10, 2014

20 May Music Faves

1. The Lumineers - Stubborn Love

2. Tom Odell - Another Love

3. Miami Horros ft. Kimbra - I Look To You

4. Mumford & Sons - Hopeless Wanderer

5. Maitre Gim's - J'me Tire

6. Veronica Maggio - Mitt Hjärta Blöder

7. Mr. Probz (Robin Schulz Remix) - Waves

8. John Newman -Love Me Again

9. John Newman - Losing Sleep

10. Chromeo - Jealous (I Ain't With It)

11. Yeah Yeah Yeahs (A-Trak Remix) - Heads Will Roll

12. José Gonzales - Heartbeats

13. Ben Howard - Promise

14. Disclosure ft. Sam Smith - Latch

15. Disclosure ft. Eliza Doolittle (Flume Remix) - You & Me

16. Flume & Chet Faker - Drop the Game

17. Flume - Holdin On

18. Baauer - DumDum

19. Zeds Dead & Omar LinX - You and I

20. John Mayer - Free Fallin'

20. Stromae - Papaoutai

Thoughts on leaving my American life behind

Put on Kodaline's - High Hopes first. Feels like a suitable song at the moment.

Last time I wrote I had some 30 days left in the states and now it's only 1,5 weeks before I'll be back in my motherland. I feel great sadness, but also crazy happiness. For the past couple of days I've been smiling by myself and thought about everyone I'm going to see again and all the fun I'm going to do this summer. At the same time this lump is persisting in my throat and I could start crying at any point. These people have become my family, my little Utica family. I've been seeing most of them every day for 9 months and it's so different living in a dorm with a lot of people opposed to living by yourself in a flat.

Midnight bowling and Saranac brewery tour this other week. Me with Dana and with Dan, our international coordinator.

You get so much closer and you're used to telling even the smallest stupidest details to each other, because you obviously see each other every day and there's not many other things to tell. Back home, at least for me, it's more about the "big" moments, here it's also the small everyday ones. Somehow I feel I get to vent my feelings and thoughts more often, because there's always someone to talk to, and some pressure is released by this. I don't know how to explain this, it's just weird and different. So I've promised myself to be even better at venting everyday shit to my friends and keep even better contact while home (okay, even though it's semi hard since everyone lives in different cities, because nothing beats face-to-face contact!).

I'm going to miss everyone and everything to death, but then again I'm also happy to return to my normal life, leave the "bubble" and regain my independence again. I mean here I've pretty much been dependent on someone else taking me places, you can't get around whenever you want wherever you want since the walkability here is shit, and I've spent most of my study abroad at campus - which FYI is a pretty boring place in the end.

Going to miss all of you so much! Words can't describe it. At least I'll have my Finns in Finland, haha.

One of the hardest things will to be pack up nine months worth of memories (and shopping). Not because it won't fit or be overweight, but because I feel like all the things, clothes, makeup etc, have defined my year and everything seems to have some kind of memorable value. The hardest will be to tear down my memory board wall. Me and Dana are going to do it the last night together - I hope. I need someone to cry with.

Now I'm going to stop being sad, and regain that happy jittery feeling again. It's almost like I'm in love, but it's the knowledge of being back home with my loved ones in less than two weeks.

Started packing last week... Almost my whole wardrobe, and I love Ziploc vacuum bags. Best invention ever!

Sunday, April 20, 2014

A whole week of fun

Hi you!

As I'm writing this I should do approximately a hundred other things. But these are the times blogging seems more interesting. My stay in DC (and New York City for ca 22 h) was the best ever; the weather was warm, I got a couple of new friends that I hope to meet again some day - well Britta from Germany I'm going to see in NYC just before I leave the country, which will be fun. The other one lives on the other side of the world, so maybe some day, maybe never. With life you never know I guess - which makes it so beautiful and exciting.

Had a really chill weekend, which was nice considering I've been almost non-stop studying since I came back from my trip. On Friday we celebrated Holi, which is an Indian color festival that celebrates the beginning of spring. There we were a bunch of people getting covered in cold water and color, and oh so fun that was! Later a bunch of us went out to a bar to listen to an awesome local band, Last Left. Yesterday we had a BBQ and then me and Dana were just chilling and watched a movie. Today the weather was so warm and nice so we were sitting outside in the quad reading and playing football etc for some hours. Hence I'm a bit behind on a writing assignment. Wuuups! Well I'll try and catch up, honestly I don't really even care if I get a good grade on this one. If I could write it as enthusiastically as I'm writing this blog post it would be awesome haha.

Gonna miss these people!!

Tomorrow it's exactly a month until I'm home. It's exciting, but also a bit scary. I mean how long will I last this time before my wanderlust takes over? Honestly I've planned half my life around traveling at this point so yeah let's see what happens in the next couple of years.

Now I really need to write this thing. So have a nice week all!

Friday, April 11, 2014

The Traveling Kind of Girl

Nu är det typ 40 dagar tills jag är hemma på finsk mark igen. Ska chilla några dagar i NYC före det och ta en minitrip till Island också. Men sen lovar jag att jag kommer hem. Haha. Ärligt sagt kan jag inte vänta. Saknar min familj något otroligt, mina kära vänner, min perfekta lägenhet, mitt liv. Om jag var deprimerad förra året och ville fly till USA tänkte jag fel. Detta år har varit superkul, men också en emotionell berg och dalbana. Saknar stabiliteten jag har hemma och känslan av ett riktigt liv. Här lever vi i en bubbla. Samma ekorrshjul varje dag och jag känner hur mitt hela sinne fylls av negativitet och jag har svårt att se det positiva mer även om det ju såklart finns en hel del. Det är samma mänskor dag ut dag in (mycke härliga såna också!), samma fester, samma mat, samma allt. Jag gillar rutin och så, men nu känns det redan svårt att komma upp ur sängen, komma ut ur mitt rum känns som ett jobb och jag vet inte när jag senast njutit en full GOD måltid på kampus. Det finns inte helt enkelt tillräckligt med vänner som pushar en och gör en motiverad, när ens egen motivation inte räcker till. So yes, in short: I really can't wait!

Några foton från förra helgen

Appråpå något som gör mej lycklig för tillfället; jag har hittat tillbaka till Veronica Maggio. Jag tror inte jag lyssnat på min gudinna så mycket på nästan ett år nu, men nu börjar hon komma in i mitt liv igen. Tror dock detta år har varit ett av mina bästa "musikår". Har funnit kärleken i musiken jag lyssnar på och en frid och lycka sprids i mitt hjärta.

Vad annat? Jag sitter på en buss på väg till Washington DC. Ensam. För igen, inte tillräckligt med folk runt mej som sku vara intresserade av att komma med på äventyr och ut från bubblan. Sen igen går jag min egen väg och trivs bra med och för mig själv så det är lugnt. Jag har funnit mej själv lida av big case of FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) senaste månaden och samma känsla fick jag igen denna vecka, för vad kommer jag missa då jag inte är på kampus i helgen? Nu när jag sitter här på väg till en stad jag aldrig besökt och träffa mänskor jag aldrig träffat och knappast kommer träffa igen känner jag mig at peace. Det är kanske vad jag har blivit; en ensam resenär. Egentligen ser jag det som en rikedom och något som gör mig till mig själv. Jag behöver inte någon annan för att göra mig lycklig då jag trivs i mitt eget skinn, jag blir mindre och mindre beroende av att någon annan gör något för mig och lär mig göra och tänka själv (även om detta är något min mamma redan lärde mig då jag bara var ett barn, tack!) och jag har blivit så orädd att vara för mig själv och resa själv att det är otroligt. Det handlar väl bara om att lita på sig själv och kunna lita på andra. Nu ska jag sluta mitt funderas och försöka sova lite till - klockan är fem på morgonen och jag har suttit i en buss sen 4 i eftermiddags, förutom en liten stop i NYC för bussbyte. Tur att min Spotify playlist är 19 timmar lång, wifin funkar okej och jag har många ebooks....

Wheelchair basketball på torsdagen istället för nightclass och chill i Port Authority i NYC.